Writer’s block is not a block, oh no. Tis a bastardical cocktail of ennui, procrastination, self pity, boredom and I have been wallowing in it. Residual or maybe latent stupidity is also to blame. Like this avjar virus on my computer, it has stood its ground and refused to be fully cleaned out. Am i doomed to forever have the bitch lurking at the back of my mind, ever present and ever mooning?
For DAYS my imp, with fingers perpetually poised over this keyboard has been quivering on the edge of spewing brilliance. He’s been spilling ideas in paragraphettes and generally saying “i’m back. yea. yea. Seriously.” which is bloody annoying because his attention is almost always switched to other shit.( facebook, youtube and cartoons.)
The post that I’m supposed to be writing has hung around my draft folder for long enough to need serious re-tensing/ rewording BUT i’m too bored with it to care. Sigh. here goes.
WHAT DO THE ALSHAFUCKWITS EAT?
For the past week or so, I have had a big craving for injera bread and the wonderfully spiced meat that comes with it. I have found myself constantly thinking about orange chilli, strange spices and the delicate hands that’ll be chopping, kneading, sprinkling, stirring and baking my meal into being.
Methinks that going with a particularly irrational piece of illogic, my mind decided that by eating the same thing as those al shafools, it’d experience a burst of understanding; an aha moment so large that I’d be able to convincingly explain to everybody( but mostly myself) what the fuck and why the fuck and how the fuck.
I was as proud and patriotic as I’ll never be again when NTV showed a bunch of weepy looking government men and women swearing into the cameras that they were going to do all they could to gently guide and nudge the people who were affected by the infernal 7/11 blasts back onto the road of normalcy. They offered help, didn’t they? By way of money to cater for hospital/burial bills. I didn’t hallucinate this. They really did.
Why then am i sensing a shameful sticky smelly issue of bureaucracy? We all know that behorned *B* word is just another synonym for thievery. People haven’t received the money that they were promised and the man inside my radio said the money is going to be distributed next week but why so late, eh? What gives?
Our leadership came out and said things, distributed safi and gave somber interviews. I’m hoping it wasn’t all for show because if it was, I have another job for ’em alshacowards. I’ll even pay them. With all that i’ve got.