Now THIS is what my article should’ve READ like. Screw you, infernal sub. Rot in Rachel K-hell. I hear “DO NOT STOOP”. But you sub, eh? I’ma Maponye you-Lady SINISTERfully.


Dumbing it down-as Lupe Fiasco put it can be defined as having to crouch to somebody else’s mental level, which is usually not very high (or is at least lower than your own). This article isn’t going to offend anybody because we all, smart or not, think we’ve got tip top minds.  One usually dumbs oneself down when they’ve been to church or counseling class or some other place where humility is rooted for; if the dumb person is the one thing between them and something intensely desirable and if they expect gratification of some sort, usually sexual. A lot of guys have told me “Dumb girls are hotter.” I think what they’re being too coy to say is, “Dumb girls are easier.”

When asked if he’d ever had to stoop- mentally- Nuwamanya and a good few other people couldn’t resist the frustrating and juvenile reply, “I’m doing it right now- just by speaking to you.”  He finally said he did it because the (dumb) girl had, “An ample bosom.”

There’s a disturbing belief that lurks around the womanhood guild that a man will lose interest in a girl the moment he realizes she’s smart, so she by all means must be sure to give his ego wiggle room by acting extremely dumb or at least dumber than him. Such bollocks.

Lucy Chihandae says, “I only ever did so to keep the peace. Some people get threatened by your shine but I think the world needs to connect with my awesomeness and if anyone is threatened, I’m not going to be kind. Call me a snob, but it’s up to people to get out of their esteem dark-corners and smell the coffee.”

One of the smartest people I have ever met, let’s call them Lulu, once received a phone call from somebody they were actively pursuing. I have never before seen such a heart breaking transformation, from smart as a whip to unbelievably mediocre, in so short a time. I can only hope that they got what they wanted from the caller, if only as retribution for the constant ache I have in my jaw now- from it dropping so low that Thursday evening.

Ntaro gives us this story. Whereas it doesn’t hit our theme on the head directly, it’s pretty funny. He says, “I went to an internet café and asked the lady for 30 minutes. She was not sure what I had said, so I repeated my request. She thought I was playing. I gave her two thousand shillings and she said “This is more than one thousand”. I told her I was aware of this and she, for some reason, thought I was playing-again. So I asked, “Are you sure?” and just like that, her brain visibly lit up with understanding and she gave me time for 500shillings-what I had asked for in the first place- and my balance.” Dumb people really do slow the world down.

Victoria Kiconco says, “If you are susceptible to headaches, do not ever attempt to dumb yourself down for whoever, whenever- unless you absolutely must. For some reason, dumb people like to hear themselves speak. My advice is to let them go on and on. The occasional “anha” or “mhmm” or whatever the commonplace may perceive as, “go on” should do. Curt nods also help, but too many of those will give you a migraine…just steer clear of these people.”

On the flip side, dumbing it down can be refreshing. With one’s “less gifted” acquaintances, one’s mind doesn’t have to be constantly working away at being smart, engaging or even reasonable and crafting witticisms and impressive retorts while speaking to intellectual equals can get tiring, especially if you’re feeling low. Erique Mununuzi says, “Not having to think much before  speaking can be refreshing because dumb people are very undemanding. They’ll just nod and think me cool, where a smart person might have frowned and walked away. It requires practice though and facebook is a great place to get this practice.”

Enos Wakoko is however pretty sure that overexposure to dense people gradually rots your brain. We become like the people we hang out with,  usually. You’ve been warned.

Now i’m too lazy to make it into a blog-type-story-thingie, but what the hell. My baby is here, on the global internetz (as it should’ve appeared in that paper thingini that i beat brilliantiasms out for.)

Hating on stupid people makes me happy. Sigh*



About Miz. Kyrte

I read, I write, I love. My favorite quote is: We're all going to die, all of us, what a circus! That alone should make us love each other but it doesn't. We are terrorized and flattened by trivialities, we are eaten up by nothing. Bukowski, baby! Extremes ;-)

8 responses to “ME-PEGASUS, YOU-PHEASANT *tEEth*

  1. Marvis

    Ko the name-dropping eh! But great article all the same. and if ths comment isnt dripping wth witticisms, i reference Enos, hanging wit dumb ppl has blunted moi 🙂

  2. I can see your smile.

    This is hilarious.

  3. petesmama

    Much better than the sub-enhanced version.

  4. Much much. She’s the bitCHsub. I DARE her to touch another one of my babies. *tEEth*
    Thank goodness Dianne is back.

  5. Lakil

    After reading this, am abit afraid to say anathing to anyone; I don’t exactly enjoy being called dumb. But I did enjoy reading. Kudos.

  6. Anybody with the good sense to throw Lady sinister the kudoses* she deserves is probably smart. har har.


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