LIFE ACCESSORIES*

So I could bitch and weep and bite my editor for grossly MAL-titling this one, but it was so gloriously UN edited. Un SUB edited; so i forgive him. I even kinda love him (for this).

LIFE ACCESSORIES.

A lot of things, let’s call them life accessories, determine the people one decides to hang out with and the people who decide to hang out with one.

Because it isn’t his department, Cupid couldn’t be bothered about friendships and how they’re formed so he leaves this entirely to human beings and whatever devices they’ve got.

As is the doctrine of all self help books, it never hurts to put your best foot forward and this is where the “life accessories” come in. Forget the tasteful tie and the pretty brooch. Human beings seem to have changed their priorities and upped their standards as well. When boy meets girl, there are a few accessories he’s got to have before she allows to walk off into some sunset with him. These ones may or may not apply, depending on the people you associate with.

Books:
Readers are extremely popular nowadays, even more so if they’re into abstract or rare authors. There’s now a lot of nose-turning and snubbing of the Sidney Sheldons and Danielle Steeles of this world and the knowledge of Arundhati Roy’s existence has started at least two friendships I know of.

Band knowledge:
Forgetting the fact that we have perhaps five well known bands in this country, a lot of people keep special reserves of awe for those who know their bands. Once you can name at least 10 reasonable rock bands off the top of your head and have a decent conversation about their albums, “cool” is the label and its yours. Complete with a cucumber. Rock and the love of it has officially become an accessory.

Writers, whether or not they rock have always held themselves in high regard. Being able to transform a blank page into a beautiful/inspirational read is a bit like creation. Now a blog is like a pet you don’t have to take care of and one or two posts a week is enough to keep it going. When people, mostly the non-bloggers find out that somewhere on the internet one has a blog they almost always gasp in… something, awe maybe.

All of a sudden, all the cool kids in the play pen that is Kampala are just wild about old things. Never mind that vintage for most of them is a word they use to refer to things that were popular 10 years ago. It’s also suddenly cool to drive around in a beaten up old car. This one is puzzling. Does this have anything to do with the fact that Bella Twilight drove a really beaten up orange truck?

Little dogs: I think these ones are just ugly, what with their excess of fur and large blood flecked eyes. For no discernible reason, apart from the fact that a couple of dumb girls on E! News carry them around, they are all the rage with all my large purse-d friends.

Eccentricity: Any odd behavior, even if it only stops short of making people run off in disgust is labeled eccentric. It’s always been a big deal with human beings to be viewed as unique individuals so odd behavior, as long as it’s not excessively offensive is officially a plus.

L.S.

Kati. Tell me. How the fuck does this deserve to be titled ” LIFE ACCESSORIES DETERMINE OUR HANGOUTS”??

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About Miz. Kyrte

I read, I write, I love. My favorite quote is: We're all going to die, all of us, what a circus! That alone should make us love each other but it doesn't. We are terrorized and flattened by trivialities, we are eaten up by nothing. Bukowski, baby! Extremes ;-)

4 responses to “LIFE ACCESSORIES*

  1. petesmama

    ROTFLMAO!!! My sister, it will get worse before it gets better.

  2. Tell me about the peanuts yo paid again? The ones that make you walk hastily in Wandegeya…hehehe

    • Ah. The pointy fingered laughter of the uninitiated. Those peanuts don’t hurt (and i always walk hastily).
      P.s What if i was Just putting it on? I’m the sinister one. Maybe I use sinister ways to get out of having to talk to some people, hehehehe.

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